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I was absolutely nuts and crazy
about my neighbor, she was a
lady of about thirty years old,
married but her husband was
an absolute jerk. He worked
shifts at some geological site
and sometimes he was missing
for days spending his time in
the mountains looking for gold
and stuff like that. His wife,
Jane would easily drive any
man crazy, she was a brunette
with long legs and big, yummy
boobs, her face was beautiful
and one could drown in her
deep, dark eyes. I really
couldn’t understand why she
married her husband, he was
the exact opposite of her, a
middle-aged man with a belly.
It was obvious that Jane
wouldn’t stand him for long and
recently I began to notice that
when her husband was on his
shift she was visited by a man,
he stayed over at her place and
it was certain she cheated on
her husband.
I must say that I didn’t care, I
didn’t blame her as a woman
like her needs a good man by
her side, but not her husband.
The only thing that was as
frustrating as it could be was
that I was not her lover and I
wished I were. My problem was
that I was too young at that
time, I was only 20 and she was
ten years older than me. Of
course she never even thought
about me being her lover, but I
dreamed about her so much,
lying in my bed and jerking off
imagining her close to me,
riding and sucking my dick.
I definitely felt I needed to do
something so one day I decided
to try my luck. She lived on the
second floor and I lived on the
first, so I walked up and
knocked on her door. It was
Sunday, and I was sure that she
was home. She opened the
door in her sexy, red robe, I
really wanted to know what
she was hiding behind it and I
was looking at her numb and
unable to say anything. She
was really hypnotizing me with
her beauty.
“Hi, Kevin, can I help you”, she
was the first to start and I
sighed with relief.
“Mrs. Jane, I need to talk to you
about your husband”, I said as
that was the first thing that
came to my mind.
“Ok, come on in, what exactly
do you want to talk about?”,
She let me in and I could see
that she was intrigued.
“I think you’re abusing your
relations with him, he loves you
so much and I’ve been noticing
some men visiting you while he
was taking his shifts”, I shot
right from the shoulder. I knew
this was a bit rush to start like
that, but I decided to cut to the
chase, I looked into her eyes
and saw them widening with
anger.
“What the fuck!, It’s none of
your business! Get out of
here!”, She shouted and I could
see that I really made her
angry, may be I shouldn’t have
started that so rudely but I felt
I had nothing to lose.
“Well, maybe you’re right, it’s
none of my business, but I am
sure it’s your husband’s
business and he’ll be very
interested in the information
that I possess, I took some
pictures of this guy and I’ll
show them to your husband,
just wanna see his reaction”, I
was bluffing, of course I didn’t
take any pictures and I never
even thought about it, but my
bluffing had a strong influence
on Jane.
“Wait, Kevin, what do you
want?, are you trying to
blackmail me? Do you want
money?”, She asked and I
understood that I hooked her
up.
“No, I don’t need your money, I
need something else you can
give me”, I said and understood
that I’ve had it made. She was
afraid of her husband learning
the truth so she was going to
do what I wanted her to do.
“What do you mean, Kevin?,
What exactly do you want from
me?”, Jane asked and I knew I
had to make a small step to my
goal.
“I want you to treat me as the
man who visited you while your
husband was away”, I said in a
firm voice
Jane looked at me and her eyes
told me that she understood
what I wanted from her. She
smiled and didn’t say a word,
she just approached me and
put her hand on my shoulder,
“So, is that why you’re here?, so
what exactly do you want me
to do first?”
I felt that my mouth went dry,
Mrs. Jane was very sexy and her
voice was so alluring that I felt
getting dizzy.
“How about this, I’ll play with
your dick and let you cum and
we’ll forget about the whole
thing?”, she offered and
kneeled.
I was standing in the corridor
and when she started
unzipping my pants I leaned
against the wall and closed my
eyes, I still couldn’t believe this
was happening to me. In a
minute my dick jumped out of
my pants and it was rock-hard.
Jane took it in her hands and
exposed my dickhead, it was
wet with precum, she looked at
it for a second and then started
licking it. I can’t describe what I
was feeling at that moment. My
dream was coming true, I
opened my eyes and looked at
Jane, her tongue was skillfully
working on my dickhead and in
about a minute she took my
dick in her mouth and started
sucking it. That was the real
pleasure, for a twenty year old
guy whose mind was focused
on sex only that was more than
enough, She was sucking me so
skillfully that in about two
minutes I felt I was building up
to an orgasm, I didn’t want to
stop her and I just took her
head in my head and started
impaling her on my dick trying
to get as deeper in her throat
as I could, suddenly she
squeezed my dick with her
mouth and I started cumming,
my sperm hit her throat and
tried to push my dick deeper
and deeper, Jane was a great
sucker, she started moving her
head along my dick so quickly
letting her mouth squeeze
every drop of me, my orgasm
was really intense, I was
moaning and groaning and she
was still sucking on my dick
even after I completely drained
my balls.
“Oh, boy, you got my pussy wet
and leaking, you’re so
passionate and you’ve flooded
me with your cum”, She said
and licked the drops of my cum
from her lips.
“let me make some coffee and
why don’t you go to the room
and wait for me on the sofa”,
she said and headed to the
kitchen, and I went to the hall, I
was unable to speak and my
legs were shaking, that was the
best blowjob I ever got.
I sat on the sofa and in a
minute Jane came with a tray
and two coffee cups on it, I took
one and she put the tray on the
table. We drank coffee and
talked a bit. When I finished my
cup I felt that I was returning to
senses. I looked at Jane and
realized that I wanted her
again.
“So, now it’s time to please my
pussy, it’s all wet and do you
want to find out how wet it
is?”, She said in an alluring
voice and came up to me. She
then slightly pushed me and I
lay on the sofa, after that I saw
her unbuttoning her robe and
in a few seconds she was
leaning over me absolutely
nude. Her body was slender
and her legs were long and
slim.
“Do you want to know how wet
my pussy is now?”, she
repeated her question and was
waiting for me to answer.
“Yes”, I murmured still not
knowing what she was going to
do.
She moved closer to me and sat
on my face!!! That was the first
time a woman was sitting on
my face, her pussy was on my
mouth and I felt how wet it
was. She pressed her pussy to
my mouth and started rubbing
it over my face, in a few
seconds all my face was wet
with her love juices, I stuck my
tongue out and started licking
her pussy, whenever I touched
her clit she was moaning, in a
few minutes she turned into a
real horny bitch and started
rubbing all over my face with
such fury that I felt I was going
to choke, I just held my tongue
out and was moving it all over
her pussy, it went like this for
about five minutes, then she
got off my face and looked at
my dick. It was rock-hard by
that time.
She moved closer to my dick
and mounted it. Her pussy was
so pleasantly wet that my dick
easily got inside and in a
second Jane started riding it
like a wild cowboy. I was just
lying and seeing her going up
and down my dick, her tits
were jumping before my face,
the speed was incredible and I
understood how horny that
bitch was. It was the second
fuck so I managed to last much
longer and in a few minutes we
were both sweating.
When Jane felt that she was
satisfies, although it’s hard for
a bitch like her to get enough,
she got off from my dick and lay
close to me, then she took my
dick in her hands and started
jerking it quickly, her face was
right before my dick, when I
started shaking she understood
that my orgasm was near so
she opened her mouth wide
and kept jerking my dick, in a
few seconds I presented her
with a cumshot that hit her
face, then second and the third,
I was cumming intensely and
some of my sperm got inside
her mouth, some of it was all
over her face and hair, she kept
jerking my dick until there
wasn’t a tiny cum drop left in
my balls and after that she took
it into her mouth and sucked
my dick until it was pure and
clean. I was lying on the sofa,
seeing Jane licking my
dickhead, she was covered in
my cum and she looked funny. I
smiled and thought that this
was just a dream when I woke
up but we can make our
dreams come true. All we need
is to try that.
“So, when’s your hubby
arriving?”, I asked in a relaxed
voice.
“He won’t be in town until after
Wednesday”, She answered in
a sweet voice.
“Well, then I’ll drop by tonight if
you don’t mind”, I said and rose
from the sofa.

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Tags: Sex jokes

The Psychiatrist(sex jokes)

GIRL: I have sinned. I called my boyfriend a bastard. PSYCHIATRIST: Well now, that's not a nice thing to call anyone, so what did he do to deserve that? GIRL: Well, he kissed me. PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (The psychiatrist kissed the girl) GIRL: ......Yes! PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a bastard. GIRL: But, he put his hand in my top. PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (The psychiatrist put his hand in the girl's top) GIRL: Yes! PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a bastard. GIRL: But, he took my clothes off. PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (The psychiatrist took off the girl's clothes) GIRL:Yes! PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a bastard. GIRL: But, he had sex with me! PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (The psychiatrist had sex with the girl) GIRL:.Yes! PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a bastard. GIRL: But then he told me he has AIDS. PSYCHIATRIST:BA STARDDDDDDDDD!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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