The Psychiatrist(sex jokes)

I would dip my finger in the wine
and let it drip onto my erect
nipples, then I would massage
them and suck my fingers. Since
it was hot and I was basically
naked, I also began to drip wine
on my mound and play with my
clitoris. I was already wet, and
discovered that I liked the taste
of me and wine, after reaching
orgasm a couple of times I began
to feel I was being watched. I
continued to enjoy the night air,
spreading my legs wide, and
looking around to see if there
was anyone watching. As I got
up to go inside, my robe fell off
and slid to the ground below. I
leaned over the balcony railing to
see where it had fallen to and
was surprised to see the most
gorgeous redhead woman
looking up at me. She took a
couple of steps off her patio, at
this point she could see every
inch of my front. She said that
her name was Danielle, and if I
would like, she would bring it up
to me, I said sure, thanks. It
seemed like only seconds and
there was a knock on my door, I
figured what the hell she has
already seen everything I have so
I went to the door naked except
for a wine glass. I never expected
what was waiting for me on the
other side of the door, there was
Danielle, wearing nothing but my
robe. I invited her in, poured her
a glass of wine, freshened mine,
and we sat down and started to
talk. She was perhaps the most
beautiful woman I have ever
seen, fire red hair just past her
shoulders, and green eyes. I
could not keep my eyes off of her
body, marvelous breasts, and a
thick patch of red between her
legs. When we sat down, she had
picked the couch, while I was in
a chair, after her second glass of
wine, she stretched, laid down
and dripped some wine on her
breasts. She said that if I wanted
to I could lick it off, I was on her
so fast I almost spilled my wine. I
licked and sucked each nipple,
then moved up to her mouth,
searching every part of it with
my tongue. We were both very
hot, kissing and playing with
each others' nipples, I had been
on top of her, but she quickly
switched positions and began to
move down my body kissing all
the way. As she danced her
tongue around my nipples, I
thought I would explode, but she
stopped and moved her head
down to my p**sy. I spread my
legs so that she could get her
tongue where ever she wanted.
She knew just what and how
hard to lick and soon I came. I lay
back exhausted, she said that
she hoped that she was better
than my earlier solo times. As I
looked past my breasts and over
my p**sy to her gorgeous face I
could only say thank you. She sat
up and I refilled our wine
glasses, I started to paint on her
breasts with the wine and then
lick them clean. I took her hand
and led her down the hall to the
bedroom, stopping just inside
the door to kiss. She lay down on
the bed and I could resist her
thick red patch no longer, she
tasted so good. As my tongue
worked her clitoris, I moved my
hands to her breasts. Her nipples
were so big, she was close to
coming. She began to arch her
back pushing my face further
into her p**sy, her legs began to
tighten around my head, and her
hands in my hair kept me on that
magic spot. It seemed that she
came forever, finally releasing
me, I was so wet and hot that I
wanted her to go down on me
again, instead she drew my face
to hers and we kissed, long and
deep. Her fingers eased in my
dripping p**sy, she began to
draw on my breasts with my
juice, going back for more to
draw with, finally having me
come and fill her hand which she
wiped on my face and then
slowly, and ever so gently
cleaned me. I was so exhausted
and satiated that all I could do
was put my head on her breasts,
a nipple in my mouth, a hand in
her magnificent mound, and fall
asleep. I realized that this was
the beginning of a beautiful
relationship.

Tags: Sex jokes

The Psychiatrist(sex jokes)

GIRL: I have sinned. I called my boyfriend a bastard. PSYCHIATRIST: Well now, that's not a nice thing to call anyone, so what did he do to deserve that? GIRL: Well, he kissed me. PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (The psychiatrist kissed the girl) GIRL: ......Yes! PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a bastard. GIRL: But, he put his hand in my top. PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (The psychiatrist put his hand in the girl's top) GIRL: Yes! PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a bastard. GIRL: But, he took my clothes off. PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (The psychiatrist took off the girl's clothes) GIRL:Yes! PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a bastard. GIRL: But, he had sex with me! PSYCHIATRIST: You mean like this? (The psychiatrist had sex with the girl) GIRL:.Yes! PSYCHIATRIST: Well that's no reason to call him a bastard. GIRL: But then he told me he has AIDS. PSYCHIATRIST:BA STARDDDDDDDDD!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Created at 2013-09-14 20:39:17

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The Psychiatrist(sex jokes)